The NFL’s TV ratings continue to slide, and commissioner Roger Goodell is looking for ideas to improve the situation.

Any ideas. Literally anything at this point.

You want to put cowboy hats on the referees? The NFL will consider it. Is there a way to reunite the cast of “Friends” on an NFL field? You tell me!

Here are three ideas that could put the league back on top:

Classic TV sweeps ploys

If you want to increase television ratings, you go right to the source: television history. If the NFL wants to get back on track, they shouldn’t get creative, they should simply rip off the longstanding ratings grab traditions.

Think crossover episode, think celebrity cameo, think surprise wedding. Throw in a twist ending every once in a while. Have a dog show up unannounced, or introduce a smart-mouthed neighbor.

Let’s siphon off some of those hot MLB playoff ratings with a player crossover scenario. Tom Brady’s playing some baseball in a football helmet? Now you’re watching.

Also, maybe some key players should be given an evil twin.

More villains

As it stands right now, the only true villain is the league itself – constantly limiting players’ self expression, levying fines, suspending players without due process under the collective bargaining agreement.

People need someone to hate, and everyone hates a man in a mustache (see: Jeff Fisher), so encouraging mustache growth might lead to some villain fabrication.

You might hate Odell Beckham now, but you’d hate him more if he had a bushy mustache.

Make football great again

Many believe the ratings dip is mostly due to the circus-like election taking place for the highest office in the nation.

Much like America, this sport needs a significant increase in greatness, and who better than the ratings king himself to give it a boost.

“The Donald” would pull out all the stops for the NFL for the right price. He’ll insult women, babies, the players, the players’ babies – whatever or whoever you want him to insult, really. He’ll hurl epithets at the fans until they love him. It will be tremendous.

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